LaLaGirl – Twinfinite Chaos! Parenting Multiples and Dealing with Autism

One of the things that’s great about having a teenager is that I always seem to learn new words. Words like…McGANGBANG!

Do you know what a McGangBang is? You can check Urban Dictionary for the official definition, but I’ll fill you in. It’s a McChicken sandwich placed between the two patties of a McDouble. Like so:

I really have no interest whatsoever in EATING a McGangBang, but I do want to order one! I wonder if they’ll know what it is at our Mickey D’s? I’m sure it’s likelier that they know in our old ‘hood.

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That’s what someone told me recently – it’s unbecoming for someone my age, and someone who is a mother of five, to use foul language. And hey, it’s probably true. And if you read my blog, you probably think I have a filthy mouth. Let me tell ya, I use the f-word a whole lot more when I’m writing than when I’m speaking. This blog serves as an outlet for me to vent my frustrations much of the time, so the frustrations of being a mother of five are probably evident in my writings. I’m okay with that.

I am trying to really clean up my language in real life, though. Again – not a huge, super potty mouth or anything, but I do say shit more often than I should. MY HUSBAND is the big potty mouth in our house, and his favorite word seems to be motherfucker. This bothers me not in the least. But I do think it sounds kind of ugly when it comes out of ME.

I’m not talking about those big events, like stubbing your toe so hard you see stars. Sometimes, occasions arise where the f-word just feels appropriate. In those instances, I think you should just go with it. Just let it loose. I’m talking about ordinary, everyday conversation. Have you ever had a conversation with someone who couldn’t come up with any other adjectives besides fucking? You know what I’m talking about. Fucking cold weather we’re having in Colorado today. Yep. Did you see that fucking car slide across the ice? THAT’S what I’m talking about. (And yeah, it IS cold in Colorado today. Brrrr!) I don’t want to be that mom.

And here’s the thing – I’m actually MORE annoyed by that “fake” cussing than I am by the real thing. To me, if you’re going to say “cheese and rice” or “God bless America” or “oh, sugar” or “what the fishsticks”, you might as well just say the real thing. Your intent is already there. Why are we playing this game? You know how for some people, hearing the f-word is like nails on a chalkboard? That’s how it is for me when I hear someone say, “Eff that!” (I will make an exception for, “What the French, toast?” because that commercial just cracks me up.)

I don’t want to hear my kids call each other motherfuckers, but I also don’t want them to think “rubber duckers” is an appropriate substitution. So I’m cleaning it up!

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