So, I’ve already gone on and on about my gallbladder woes. I’m trying to be proactive about my health, so I went to my OB/GYN and had my annual girl parts exam, and then to my GP to talk about my chronic headaches and gallbladder issues. Go, me! I didn’t think I’d hit this stage of my life so soon. Figured this would hit after the metamucil years, y’know? Anyway. I had an appointment the other day for an abdominal ultrasound, first one I’ve had in quite awhile where they didn’t tell me I was having twins. I have an appointment for a CT scan tomorrow, to make sure there isn’t something growing in my head. And I gave a whole bunch of blood for various tests.

You can imagine, probably, that I’m feeling a little freaked out by some of this. So I was a little startled to get a voice mail yesterday that I needed to call the clinic as soon as possible. And of course, you can’t just call a phone number. You have to contact the Call Center, then press 4, then press 1, then enter your ID number, then sit on hold for someone to answer, then wait while they connect you to the clinic, then hold waiting for someone to answer THERE, then hold some more. When I said I was returning a call for test results, she took my info and then said, “Uhhh, I need to have you hold on for just a moment, Laura…” I swear, I was on hold for probably 3 minutes, during which time I thought I was probably DYING. She finally came back on the line and said, “Okay! Your labs all came back normal.”

Um. Great? That’s good news, I guess? But, you couldn’t have sent me a postcard? Just…not called me at all? No news is good news, right? You had to terrify me for ten whole minutes just to tell me my labs were fine. SUPER. THANKS. I’ll move on with my life now.

Frickety frackety Kaiser.

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